Monday, March 3, 2008

First trip w/out children post adoption:

First I must say, I am lagging behind in my blogging! I will try to do better, but when life is just going along at its usual busy pace, something falls by the wayside and lately it has been my blogging! Sorry! (I need to post pics of our China travel group was so fun! Buffi has some cute ones on her blog if anyone wants to take a peek!)

Rob and I went away this weekend without our children. I was very concerned about doing this only 7 mos. post adoption. VERY concerned, but I knew in my heart it was the right thing to do. This is so necessary people! Our husbands are to come second only to GOD. I put my children before my husband so much of the time; easy to do when you have young ones. BUT, taking time to refocus, reconnect needs to be more of a priority. This weekend we were able to do just that as Rob and I went on our church's marriage retreat in Gatlinburg. We had a blast, but my reason for writing this it to tell you about how K & Q fared during our absence.

Two days before we left, we began telling them that mommy and daddy were leaving, but we would be back. We told them exactly who would be here to put them to bed and how long we would be gone (two night nights). We planned for my parents to come for the first day and night and Rob's parents come for the next day and night. They kept all six children at our house which I think helped tremendously. Also a plus was that all the children were together, not split up. We called them frequently and talked to them on the phone, telling them again that we were coming back. Their older siblings also told them frequently that "mommy and daddy are coming back tomorrow" or whenever it applied. Kimmie and Quan did amazing! Kimmie only cried at naptime (not unusual as she doesn't like to stop playing now!) but not at bedtime. When we got home Sunday they both were excited to see us and very sweet with spontaneous hugs during the evening. (I was apprehensive about Quan's reaction. One time we called and he did not want to talk to us. I was afraid he might not want us to come home because he was having too much fun with his grandparents! But he was very sweet about seeing us again!) I am in awe, because this is just GOD! I was so afraid we would have setbacks in attachment, but they seem to be even more adjusted now! How can that be? Only the Lord!

So I write this to you who may be needing a get-away but are not sure. First, pray. God will lead you! Second, if He says to go, by all means GO HONEY CHILD! GO! and Third, don't you waste your time worrying about how those babies are gonna do. If God leads you to time alone with your husband, He's got all those details worked out already. I do hope every one of you will sometime in the near future get to get away with just your hubby. I totally understand that sometimes it's just not possible, not even once a year! But when it CAN happen, it's refreshing and SO NEEDED! Thank you sweet grandparents for loving and caring for our children so thoroughly all weekend! And thank you Lord for keeping everyone so healthy!

By the way, the retreat WAS wonderful, the speakers were right on target teaching about children and communication, and the SLEEP was THE BEST! ;) Every chance we had, we slept! Some people hiked, walked, shopped....not us! Sleep, baby...that's the way to go!


The Princess's Mommy said...

Oh how wonderful! I'm so glad you had a good time and the kids did OK! Have a great week!

mommy24treasures said...

SO glad all went well for everyone:)
We will have to do the zoo Laine!
April will be better it will be much prettier. When you don't go often you don't want to spend the money right now for the first time in a while. There are so many things that are kind of closed for the cold weather and its so much prettier in the Spring.

Family4Liv said...

Your back!

Wow your excursion sounds almost heavenly! I may just take your advice and jaunter off with the husband for at least one night away. Now how will I do this???It seems so foreign, sad but true!! Il have to take it up with the BIG guy (God)...

Im sure glad to know that Kimmie and Quan were A-okay!
Nice to hear from you as always. _

Keisha said...

Glad you had a great weekend with your hubby! Those ARE much needed times!
love you!

Sherri said...

You guys are sooooooooooo fortunate to have your parents close by to allow you to do this!

Your kids are lucky, too!

Your parents are also!

We have never lived in the same state as both sets of our parents. :(


The Young's said...

I am SO with you Laine!!! We've had the kids spend the night away from us a couple of time since we've been home. My pastors wife really encouraged me. She said "how else is Sadie going to know you're coming back if you don't leave her". That just released me! It really does help having them stay with their siblings! Gatlinburg sounds WONDERFUL!!! We need to do a long get away like that!! I am SO thrilled you and Rob had a fantastic time....and especially got some much needed sleep. That's all Mark and I want to do too!! We are a little behind!! :) Thanks for a great post!!!

By the way, it really was SO wonderful to see you at the reunion! We just LOVE you guys!! Sophie and Katie Lyn have been emailing each other. It's SO cute!! Have a great week!
Love ya,

Mike and Barb said...

See, just one more step towards normalcy! I think our Mommy-being is in total overdrive after adoption.
So good to hear that you guys had a good weekend!
Love, Barb

Aimee said...

I love reading all your wonderful practical advice! Thank you for sharing your life.

Southern Cheesehead said...

good points, but sleep? what is that? LOL

can't wait to see the rebel rousers THIS SATURDAY!!!!!!!

Sonya said...