Thursday, April 2, 2009

Divine Reveal!


I have to write this now, because if I wait too much longer I will forget these emotions!

Candace Updates:

Sweet Candace. She teaches me so much. Scratch that. GOD teaches me so much through her. Sometimes I am SO awfully stubborn that I don't want to learn these lessons, I don't want to change. Thank you Lord for your mercy and forgiveness with your children.

I hear a lot "How's her language?"

Let me assure you her language is flourishing. Notice I didn't say English is flourishing. HER LANGUAGE is flourishing. I wouldn't call it Chinese. I wouldn't call it local dialect anymore. It's some sort of mumble jumble with a few recognizable English words thrown in. So maybe we're in a transition period? Regardless, her English words are increasing, albeit not quite fast enough for me, the "instant gratification-I want it now" momma. Yes, that's one of those lessons I'm learning! ;) She doesn't seem to be bothered by the fact that she speaks differently than we do. Now she very well COULD be bothered, but she doesn't show it. She is one stoic little girl who doesn't share her deep seated emotions too often. But I'll get into that in another paragraph. This is about her language. She communicates with us very well using signs, gestures, a few English words...and she gets her point across, no problem. Last week we worked on emotional vocabulary words...you know, like sad and happy. I'm not really giving Candace organized teaching English time. I just talk to her all the time and name things as we got about our day and I read to her with Kimmie and Quan. (She's got Brown Bear down pat---some of the words are even intelligible! She's got the rhythm of it NAILED! ;) We sing our ABC's a lot and count a lot. She's ready for some organized school now, and I'm so excited to begin her in a K5 curriculum. Yes, she's eight. Yes, she went to school in her village. But until we brought her home, she has had no education. ZILCH. I'm convinced that she sat in her classroom in that little dilapidated village school. I'm convinced she gave her teacher no trouble. Yet I'm also convinced she received no individual, one on one teaching time. And she HAS to have that because she has not been able to hear for 8 years! (She's not deaf, but without a hearing aid, unless you're yelling, she cannot hear you.) It breaks my heart to think of her sitting in that classroom, probably pretending to "get" it. Going unnoticed by all. Sliding by. Did I tell you that when we were waiting to travel, they sent us by mail some of her school work? It was amazing...she was adding and subtracting huge numbers, writing English words, etc. We were in awe! Oh little did we know. Of course she had just copied all these things. She came to us not knowing how to add or subtract, not knowing her colors in Chinese even. But she could copy any and everything you put in front of her. There you have it. She sat in that desk for, what? Maybe 2 years? And just copied. No one who would help her form the reasoning behind all those letters and numbers. Just copy, be silent. And I am not mad in the least at that village school. If you could have seen it, you would not be mad either. You would want to do whatever you could to help them. Think what we could do! What CAN we do? And how? I'm still searching...

And I'm obviously going down a rabbit trail! Sorry!

Back to her language...Candace has been home almost six months, and she can say spontaneously the following:
all our names
our puppy's name
night night
Daddy loves you
Mommy loves you (can you tell we repeat these to her a lot? She doesn't say I love you, just Mommy loves you, Daddy loves you! Isn't that cute?)
cup
water
potty (and all words involved with that. Of course. Why do ALL kids love potty words?)
book
Bible
Jesus
all her colors (WOO HOO!!!!!!!)
circle
Hello? (like when something surprises her...it is so funny!)
bath, shower
Bible Study
baby
movie
car
dress
happy, sad, crying
ear, nose, eyes, mouth, hair, arm
no, yes ma'am (it comes out yega-mam...she says 's' as k or g...she never learned how to make the s or sh sound because that is a soft sound she can't hear!)
wow
eat, spoon, fork
bike
I like to move it move it (Don't ask)

Wow, I'm not even finished and that's a lot of words! I'm so glad I wrote this down! It encourages me. So many times I read other people's stories of adopting older children and it seems their kiddos pick up SO quickly on English and are speaking sentences so soon. I get discouraged about that. I have to remember that Candace's hearing is a setback for her language skills, so it will take her longer than the average bear. This is also a divine reveal...God taught me that comparing my experience with others' experiences breeds discontentment, which breeds discouragement. Looking to HIM breeds peace and contentment.

Okay, this is going to be too long...so I'm going to finish the other divine reveals another time when I have some minutes to work on it. Soon!

Thanks for listening...love to you all!

25 comments:

Tammy said...

Thank you so much for sharing about Candace. I know it's easy to get discouraged. Madi has been home a year and still isn't speaking, but I know it will come.
It sounds like Candace is doing great. BTW, have you tried Signing Time DVD's? They have been an answer to prayer for us.
Hugs,
Tammy

living4him5 said...

WOW! I couldn't get through that post without tears of saddness and joy. The part that broke my heart was about her former school days, bless her little heart she was just trying to be a good girl and follow along to the best of her ability. What an angel!

Oh how I love to read about her blossoming and growing. Isn't it amazing how perfect HIS plan was for her to be placed in your family!! He knew right where she needed to be! Good stuff!

You inspire me girl!

Love ya!
Amy

ethel said...

Laine, God really knew what He was doing when he put Candace into your lives. 6 short months and look at all she has learned. Don't be discouraged, you should be encouraged by all she has accomplished, and oh so much love showered on her by that Ferrill Bunch. She is truly Blessed. And what a blessing she is to all who know her and love her. And look at what Candace is teaching you. Can't wait for Easter to get here and our annual Easter Egg Hunt. I know those kiddos will do a great job of hiding eggs for us to find. Love to all. Ethel

The Morrison's said...

Wow, Laine!! Candace has learned so much with ya'll. I can see little things at church when she is "checking in" (which btw is equally adorable). I am not too sure if she really knows what I am saying until I say go with Carlie, but she "makes" you think she does know.
She is SO entirely blessed to be a Ferrill and ya'll are equally blessed to be with her. She is such a sweet child & I enjoy watching her.
Keep up the good work & I'll be in prayer (agreeing with you) to do something miraculous in China for the others there.

Mama Hen said...

What, that's quite a list when you think about it. It shows she knows what is important (all the family and love she receives) and that she is blossoming and learning. You are so blessed and ARE such a blessing.

Journey to Lilly! said...

Look at all the words Candance can say!! Can you imagine being dropped in a forein country & having to learn a completely new language. I have tried to learn foreign languanges & have failed..my hat is off to those who do! I am so proud of Candance. When I think of her in that little school my heart aches for her. What a precious baby. God knew the perfect mommy for her.

Thanks for sharing this post Laine. It will be neat to look back at through the years. One day, when she is writing book reports, giving class speaches, and such...you'll say....Wow, she has come a long way!

lv u,
Kim

Keisha said...

I like to Move-it.. Move-it .. too!!!
Rock on Candance!!!!!! LOL!
My kids love to sing that too!!!
So glad to hear she's doing well!!!! She's right where she belongs!! Praise God!!!
Please pray for Amy.. her father passed & his funeral is today. :(

Sherri said...

Laine,

I just did a similar post this morning about comparing my experiences with others' experiences.

As a special ed teacher, I can tell you that it is very common for compliant kids to sit there for a while before someone notices something's amiss. It's like the kids take one of 2 directions: super compliance or misbehavior.

Sweet Candace will take off now that her needs are being addressed. Like Candace, Mia was quite stoic for a very long time after we got her (another topic I addressed in today's post).

I can think of worse things she could know than I like to move it move it! I can't wait for the next update

Barbie said...

Love to hear how well she is doing. All in her own time. She has a wonderful family who is trusting God and waiting patiently for Him to reveal more and more of His little girl. And she is one amazing girl.

Aimee said...

Laine, you are such a good mommy. Really, you are!

My heart breaks to think of Candace in the village school. My heart breaks for the children that are still there. When you find out a way that we can help, can you let me know? Maybe we can go back to China and I can get my heart that I left over there...


Love you

Mom to five said...

Thnaks for sharing!! Kids are amazing aren't they?!?! Gracie is just now starting to form words. She is still having a little trouble but did have her surgery in Nov 2008. I would also recommend a signing video or game. It does work....
Also, I got the t shirt today!! Can't wait to wear it. Thankyou so much!!!

MichelleQ said...

"Comparing our experiences with others breeds discontentment.."

I love it! And that is right on, sister!!! You have NO IDEA how much hearing that blesses me today!

Thank you for sharing yourself with the rest of us!

Love you,

Michelle

Aaron and Erica said...

Laine,

I'm always so encouraged when I read your posts. I ditto what everyone else here said :)

Love you,

Erica

The Woodalls said...

Oh, bless her heart! She is one amazing little girl, isn't she! And what a blessing to see her blossom before your eyes!
Rebecca's eardrums were scarred and her ear canals were full of fluid, so her hearing was not very good (at 6 1/2 years) until we got the tubes for her. Her language has been slow to develop but she is making so much progress! Her orphanage experience was that of profound neglect, so we're dealing with lots of delays from that. She will be 8 next month and she is currently in K with Special Ed. (We've been home 18 months.)

We like to move it, move it, too! :)

Emily

Kristy said...

Hey beautiful gal! Just stopping in on OUR favorite family to give you all a big 'ol hug from Oregon.
Blessings ~

Mike and Barb said...

Oh, sweet family!
I'm so glad that Candace is with you now, and that she can navigate her life and the challenges she faces with her hand in yours...
Just keep your other hand in our heavenly Father's, he will sustain all of you in every uncertainty and frustration.
Love to all
Barb

Linda said...

Just starting to catch up on reading some of my favorite blogs, and I love your post. It sounds to me like you are doing great with teaching Candace LOTS of words and phrases. When someone doesn't speak English well, it is exhausting, isn't it?! I remember how I would strain to listen to Joanna's stories, and by the end of a day, I was physically worn out. I also want to say that even though Joanna is probably one of those older kid stories that you are talking about, she is truly an exception. She is incredibly intelligent - probably the smartest of all my children(both by birth and adoption), and definitely not the norm. On the other hand, I have poor little Abby, who is so sweet, but will probably always struggle with school work and learning. It's easy to brag about Joanna, but I don't blog about the learning struggles of Abby because it just doesn't seem fair. So - I really DO know some of what you're going through because after almost 3 years at home with us, Abby still struggles with English and has difficulty annunciating words. You're such a wonderfully patient mom!

Trace Car Driver said...

that is so awesome to hear how far candace has come since being in the ferrill family. beyond all the things she has learned, which is great btw, think of all the LOVE she has felt. that is the best part to me. i admire you so much laine. you are such a great mommy to your kiddos! oh, and brown bear is the BEST! polar bear is good too, but brown bear became a quick favorite with trace! (and me too!)

southern cheesehead said...

I understood her after AWANA last night on some words when she was speaking to you. Be encouraged, seriously! God's Word is alive and active in you and Candace!!! It's coming for her and now that she has her hearing aid then who knows what could happen?

mommy24treasures said...

sounds wonderful. Sounds like Candace has learned so much! and sounds like she has learned what a wonderful thing love and trust are:)
She is getting there! The learning part will come faster as the trust and love grow:)

Love Connie

Jana said...

Thriving ... your girl is thriving and man, oh, man, is she cute!! Bless her heart for being such a little survivor -- she must have known God was going to throw her a lfieline -- a family of her own.

Oatsvall Team said...

You go Candace ... I think Mags has a bit of her own language also ... I can totally understand most of her words, but sometimes she just decides to have a full blown conversation w/ me or read me a book and I can't understand a word ... She is confident and I like that ... Our girls make greater strides in their days than I make in mine ... I think of everything Maggie has had to adjust to in a year and I am amaze at how God has used her to teach me about my stubborn ways ...

Praise the Lord for Candace and all her WORDS ... you go girl !!!

Leighboe said...

LOL Now I've got that song in my head, Laine! Sure hope to hear her sing it sometime! "I like to move it move it!" :)

Ohilda said...

Laine,

Oh, how sad it made me to think about your beautiful girl sitting in the village school room. But God's infinite plan is always perfect and he must've been whispering in her ear, "Hang on there, dear one...you will soar on eagles wings when your family takes you home!" And she is!!!!

I also love your heart. You are such an inspiration. To mention that instead of being mad at the school you are sad, is witnessing the heart of Jesus that you so brightly shine for all to see.

You're doing an awesome job, Mama!!!!

Love you,

Ohilda

PS Thank you again for your continued prayers for my own 2 kiddos and for our family!

Amy said...

You are a blessing to Candace, she is a blessing and gift to you, you are a gift to us!(and a blessing!)